Food

🌿 Basil Oil (made ahead — the green drizzle that makes people say "what IS that")

The 10-second blanch is what keeps it VIVID green instead of dull khaki.

1. Dunk a loosely-packed cup of basil leaves in boiling water for 10 seconds, then straight into ice water.
2. Squeeze bone-dry in a towel.
3. Blitz with 1/2 cup good olive oil + a pinch of salt, 60 sec, till bright and smooth.
4. Strain through a fine sieve — or leave it flecky and rustic, gorgeous either way.

Keeps a couple days in the fridge. Bring to room temp before serving so it pours instead of sludges. Drizzle on the tomato bruschetta and pool it on the whipped feta.

🧀 Whipped Feta (the creamy base)

Feta alone is too tight — the creamy thing loosens it into a cloud.

- 1 BLOCK feta in brine (not the pre-crumbled tub — block whips smooth, crumbles stay grainy)
- 3–4 Tbsp cream cheese OR full-fat Greek yogurt
- a glug of olive oil
- a squeeze of lemon
- crack of pepper

Blitz everything smooth and fluffy (food processor or immersion blender), 60 sec. Spread thick on the crostini, pile the drained tomatoes on top, pool the basil oil over it.

That's the White–Red–Green plate: white feta, red tomato, green oil. Optional thread of honey on top — feta + tomato + honey is a knockout.

🍅 Tomato Bruschetta — the classic (your tomatoes, your basil)

The one trick nobody does: drain the tomatoes so the crostini don't go soggy.

1. Dice the early girls, halve the cherries. Toss with a good pinch of salt, sit in a colander 15–20 min. The salty water weeps away — keep nothing.
2. Dress: good olive oil, torn (not chopped) basil, one small clove grated fine OR just rub a whole raw clove on the toasted bread. Optional squeeze of lemon or splash of red wine vinegar for lift.
3. Toasts: slice the sourdough on the bias, brush with the rosemary-thyme oil, toast till golden.
4. BUILD LATE — topping meets bread within ~20 min of serving, or set out a bowl of tomatoes + a basket of crostini and let people spoon their own.
5. Finish with the basil oil drizzled over and a little flaky salt.

Lavender Shortbread Cookies

From the garden lavender, dried and beautiful.

Ingredients:
- 1 cup butter, room temperature
- 1/2 cup lavender sugar (regular sugar blitzed with 1 tablespoon dried lavender buds)
- 2 cups all purpose flour
- Pinch of salt

To make lavender sugar: pulse dried lavender buds with sugar in a food processor until the lavender is finely ground through the sugar. No food processor? Chop the buds very fine and mix by hand.

Method:
1. Mix butter and lavender sugar until smooth
2. Add flour and salt, mix until it just comes together -- don't overwork it
3. Pat into a rectangle about half an inch thick
4. Wrap and refrigerate 30 minutes
5. Cut into rectangles or rounds
6. Bake at 325F for 12-15 minutes

Keep them PALE. Not golden. Shortbread stays light. They'll be sandy, crumbly, melt in your mouth, and taste like your garden.

Four ingredients. The butter does the work. The lavender does the magic.

Lavender Simple Syrup & Lemonade

Made with dried lavender from the garden.

LAVENDER SIMPLE SYRUP:
1 cup sugar
1 cup water
1-2 tablespoons dried lavender buds

Bring sugar and water to a simmer. Add lavender. Take off heat. Steep 20-30 minutes. Strain out the buds. Store in a jar in the fridge.

LAVENDER LEMONADE:
1 cup fresh lemon juice (about 6 lemons)
4-5 cups cold water
1/2 to 3/4 cup lavender simple syrup (to taste)

Mix and serve over ice. Adjust sweetness to taste. Garnish with a sprig of lavender if you're feeling fancy.

For Lily 🌸 and Larsen. Summer 2026.

SPICY PEANUT NOODLES WITH CHICKEN 🥜🍜

NOT basic bitch white girl noodles. LEGIT.

SAUCE:
- 1/4 cup peanut butter (natural, crunchy or smooth)
- 2 tbsp soy sauce
- 1 tbsp sambal oelek (or sriracha)
- 1 tbsp rice vinegar
- 1 tbsp sesame oil
- 1 tbsp maple syrup (or honey)
- 1 clove garlic, grated
- 1 tbsp fresh ginger, grated
- Juice of 1 lime
- Splash of water to thin

NOODLES:
- Rice noodles (or whatever noodle you've got)
- 2 chicken breasts, sliced thin

TOPPINGS:
- Shredded cabbage or slaw mix
- Shredded carrot
- Cucumber, julienned
- Green onions, sliced
- Cilantro
- Crushed peanuts
- Sesame seeds
- Lime wedges
- Jalapeño slices if you want heat

Cook noodles according to package. Rinse cold. Season chicken with salt, pepper, garlic powder — cook in a hot pan until done, slice thin. Whisk all sauce ingredients together. Toss noodles in sauce. Top with chicken, all the veg, crushed peanuts, sesame seeds, cilantro, lime.

Eat cold or warm. Leftovers are BETTER the next day.

Protein per serving: ~35g with chicken
Serves: 3-4
Time: 20 minutes

The sauce is the whole thing. Make double and keep it in the fridge.

🥜🍜🔥 Not a cheese plate. ACTUAL DINNER.

SOURDOUGH DISCARD WAFFLES — Aelford's Second Life 🧇

1 cup sourdough discard (straight from the fridge is fine)
1 egg
2 tbsp melted butter (or oil)
2 tbsp sugar (or maple syrup)
1/2 tsp vanilla
1/4 cup milk
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/4 tsp salt

Mix discard, egg, melted butter, sugar, vanilla, and milk. Add flour, baking soda, salt — stir just until combined. Don't overmix.

Heat waffle iron. Cook until golden and crispy.

NOTES:
- Cold discard from the fridge works perfectly — no need to warm it
- Batter should be thick but pourable. Add a splash more milk if too thick
- The tanginess from the discard is the whole point — it balances the sweetness
- Make extra and freeze — they toast back to life beautifully
- Add blueberries, chocolate chips, or cinnamon to the batter if you're feeling fancy

Aelford's leftovers, reborn as breakfast. 🧇🍞

TACO BAR BBQ — Staff Party Friday July 10 🌮

PROTEINS (La Tortilla Mexicana, 709 Goldstream Ave):
- Barbacoa ✅ bought
- Carne Asada ✅ bought
- Pastor (al pastor) ✅ bought
- Carnitas ✅ bought
Paul grills. All pre-marinated. Thaw and grill.

TORTILLAS:
- Corn (have at home)
- Flour (from La Tortilla Mexicana) ✅ bought

SIDES:

Esquites (Mexican Street Corn Salad) — MAKE NIGHT BEFORE
- 4-5 cobs corn (or frozen), charred in cast iron or on grill
- Mayo
- Cotija cheese, crumbled (bought at La Tortilla Mexicana)
- Chili powder or Tajin
- Lime juice
- Jalapeño, diced fine
- Cilantro
- Spoonful of chipotle in adobo in the mayo — INSANE
Make night before. Better the next day.

Mexican Rice (Arroz Rojo) — make day of or night before, reheats fine
- Jasmine rice (have at home)
- Small can tomato sauce
- Chicken broth
- White onion, diced
- Garlic
- Cumin
- Oil
TOAST the rice first until golden. That's the whole secret.
Rinse rice. Toast in oil until golden. Add onion, garlic. Add tomato sauce, broth, cumin, salt. Boil, lid on, low 18-20 min. DON'T PEEK. Fluff with fork.

Refried Beans — canned is fine, heat and top with cotija and chipotle crema drizzle

Tortilla Chips and Guac

GUACAMOLE — make day of, right before
- Avocados (semi firm, ripe by tomorrow)
- Lime juice
- Salt
- White onion, fine dice
- Cilantro
- Jalapeño
- Tomato if you want it chunky

PICO DE GALLO — make day of, right before
- Roma tomatoes, 4-5, diced small
- White onion, half, fine dice
- Cilantro, big bunch, rough chopped (stems too — more flavour)
- Jalapeño, 1-2, seeded for mild, seeds for heat, fine dice
- Lime juice, 1-2 limes
- Salt — don't be shy
Make FRESH. Don't make night before — gets watery.

TOPPINGS BAR:
- Cabbage, shredded, with lime squeeze
- Pico de gallo (above)
- Quick pickled red onions (make night before — red onion, lime juice, salt, 30 min)
- Radishes, sliced thin
- Cilantro, rough chopped
- Jalapeño slices, fresh
- Lime wedges
- Cotija crumbles

SAUCES:
- Chipotle Crema: sour cream + adobo sauce from chipotle can + lime juice + salt. Five minutes. Squeeze bottle if you have one
- Cochita pineapple habanero (drizzle on EVERYTHING)
- Hot sauce (bought at La Tortilla Mexicana)

GRILLED PINEAPPLE:
- Fresh pineapple, sliced into spears or rounds
- Grill alongside the pastor until char lines appear
- Dice and serve with the al pastor or as a side

DRINKS:
Pre-batched margaritas — El Tequileño, fresh lime, triple sec, simple syrup. Big pitcher. Salt rim station.
OR spicy marg with pineapple habanero cordial.

THRIFTY'S LIST:
- Limes (lots)
- White onion
- Red onion
- Cabbage
- Cilantro
- Jalapeños
- Radishes
- Avocados (semi firm)
- Roma tomatoes
- Pineapple
- Corn (cobs or frozen)
- Refried beans (canned)
- Tortilla chips (thick restaurant-style)
- Tomato sauce (small can)
- Chicken broth
- Sour cream (if low)
- Mayo (if low)
- Eggs, Greek yogurt, rotisserie chicken, hummus, edamame, smoked salmon, good cheese (YOUR protein)

TIMELINE:
Thursday night: esquites, quick pickle red onions
Friday before party: pico, guac, chipotle crema, rice, beans, set up toppings bar, grill pineapple
Paul grills meat.
Margaritas in pitcher.

Feeds 6. Four meats. This is not a BBQ this is a CATERING OPERATION. 🌮🔥💅

GROCERY LIST — ORDER ONLINE 🛒

SMOKED THINGS:
- Smoked salmon (always in the fridge)
- Smoked trout
- Smoked mackerel

PROTEIN STAPLES:
- Eggs (minimum 2 dozen, always)
- Greek yogurt, full fat
- Prosciutto
- Salami or soppressata
- Canned smoked oysters

BEANS & LEGUMES:
- Canned chickpeas
- Canned pinto beans
- Red lentils (dried, for dal)
- Refried beans (or make your own)
- Canned white beans

NUTS:
- Marcona almonds
- Pistachios
- Cashews

PANTRY:
- Tahini (for hummus)
- Coconut milk (for dal)
- Miso paste (white, for salmon)
- Soy sauce
- Sesame oil
- Rice vinegar
- Everything bagel seasoning
- Protein powder (for smoothie days)

FROZEN:
- Edamame
- Frozen berries (smoothies)
- Salmon fillets

GROCERY LIST — HEADPHONES THRIFTY'S 🎧

CHEESE (rotating, whatever looks good):
- Aged cheddar
- Gouda
- Manchego
- Brie
- Burrata
- Goat cheese
- Feta

FRESH:
- Fresh fish — salmon, halibut, whatever's good
- Fresh dill
- Fresh cilantro
- Fresh ginger
- Lemons
- Limes
- Cherry tomatoes
- Avocados

DELI:
- Good olives
- Hummus (or make your own)
- Charcuterie meats

🦝💅🧀 Feral but bougie.

BEAN QUESADILLAS — Board Adjacent

Refried beans (canned or homemade)
Cheese — cheddar, monterey jack, whatever melts
Flour tortillas
Salsa, sour cream, guac for dipping

Spread beans on half a tortilla. Cover with cheese. Fold. Cook in a dry pan or with a little butter, 3-4 min each side until crispy and melty.

Cut into triangles. Dip. Eat standing up.

Add-ons: leftover chicken, sauteed peppers and onions, jalapeños, corn

Protein: ~20g per quesadilla
Time: 5 minutes
This is tapas. This is graze food. This is board life with a tortilla.

HUEVOS RANCHEROS — Beans Meet Eggs

1 can refried beans (or homemade — see below)
5 egg whites (or 2-3 whole eggs)
2 small tortillas
Salsa (store bought or fresh)
Cheese — cheddar, cotija, or whatever's there
Avocado, sliced
Sour cream
Hot sauce
Fresh cilantro

Warm refried beans. Fry or scramble eggs. Warm tortillas in a dry pan. Layer: tortilla, beans, eggs, salsa, cheese, avocado, sour cream, hot sauce, cilantro.

HOMEMADE REFRIED BEANS:
1 can pinto beans, drained (save some liquid)
1 tbsp butter or lard
1/2 onion, diced fine
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 tsp cumin
Salt to taste
Mash with a fork or potato masher, adding bean liquid until creamy.

Protein: ~35g with egg whites and beans
This is the one. Protein AND it feels like a treat.

BUTTER CHICKEN — The Gateway Meat

For the marinade:
500g chicken thighs, cut into chunks
1/2 cup yogurt
1 tbsp lemon juice
1 tsp turmeric
1 tsp garam masala
1 tsp chili powder
Salt

For the sauce:
2 tbsp butter
1 large onion, diced fine
4 cloves garlic, minced
1 tbsp ginger, grated
1 tsp cumin
1 tsp coriander
1 tsp garam masala
1 tsp paprika
1 can (400g) crushed tomatoes
1 cup heavy cream
1 tbsp sugar
Salt to taste
Fresh cilantro

Marinate chicken in yogurt and spices — 30 min minimum, overnight is better. Cook chicken in a hot pan until browned, set aside. Same pan: butter, onion until soft, garlic, ginger, all spices. Add tomatoes, simmer 15 min. Blend if you want it smooth. Add cream, sugar, salt. Add chicken back in. Simmer 10 min.

The sauce does all the work. The chicken is just swimming in deliciousness. You eat the protein because you're there for the SAUCE.

Protein per serving: ~35g
Serves: 4
Rice. Naan. Raita. Done.

CHANA MASALA — Chickpea Curry

1 tbsp olive oil or ghee
1 large onion, diced
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 tbsp fresh ginger, grated
1 tsp cumin
1 tsp coriander
1 tsp turmeric
1 tsp garam masala
1/2 tsp chili powder (or more)
2 cans (400g each) chickpeas, drained and rinsed
1 can (400g) crushed tomatoes
1/2 cup water
Salt to taste
Squeeze of lemon
Fresh cilantro

Cook onion until golden. Add garlic, ginger, all spices — 1 minute until fragrant. Add chickpeas, tomatoes, water. Simmer 20 minutes, mashing some chickpeas against the side of the pot to thicken. Season with salt and lemon.

Serve with naan or rice. NAAN IS BREAD. The raccoon wins.

Protein per serving: ~15g (plus whatever the naan gives you)
Makes: 4 servings
One pot. Done.

RED LENTIL DAL — One Pot, Pure Protein

1 cup red lentils, rinsed
1 tbsp butter or ghee
1 small onion, diced
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 tbsp fresh ginger, grated
1 tsp cumin seeds (or ground)
1 tsp turmeric
1 tsp garam masala
1 can (400ml) coconut milk
2 cups water or broth
1 can (400g) diced tomatoes
Salt to taste
Squeeze of lemon juice
Fresh cilantro

Heat butter, add cumin seeds until they pop. Add onion, cook until soft. Add garlic, ginger, turmeric, garam masala — 1 minute. Add lentils, tomatoes, coconut milk, water. Bring to boil, then simmer 20-25 minutes stirring occasionally until lentils are soft and broken down.

Season with salt and lemon juice. Top with cilantro. Serve with rice and naan.

Protein per cup: ~18g
Makes: 4-5 servings (leftovers are BETTER the next day)
Add raita on the side for extra protein (yogurt!)

MISO GLAZED SALMON — 20 Minutes, Ridiculous

2 salmon fillets
2 tbsp white miso paste
1 tbsp soy sauce
1 tbsp maple syrup (or honey)
1 tsp sesame oil
1 tsp rice vinegar
1 clove garlic, grated

Mix miso, soy, maple syrup, sesame oil, rice vinegar, garlic into a paste. Spread over salmon fillets. Let sit 10 minutes (or longer in fridge if you're ahead of yourself).

Bake 400F for 12-15 minutes until caramelized on top and flaky. Broil last 2 minutes for extra colour.

Serve with rice and whatever vegetable is closest. Edamame on the side.

Protein per fillet: ~35g
Time: 20 minutes total
Difficulty: Easier than focaccia

SHAKSHUKA — Eggs in Spicy Tomato

1 tbsp olive oil
1 small onion, diced
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 tsp cumin
1 tsp paprika (smoked if you have it)
1/2 tsp chili flakes
1 can (400g) crushed tomatoes
Salt to taste
5 eggs (or egg whites if going hard)
Feta cheese, crumbled on top
Fresh cilantro or parsley

Sautee onion in olive oil until soft. Add garlic, cumin, paprika, chili flakes — 1 minute. Add crushed tomatoes, salt, simmer 10 minutes until thick. Make wells in the sauce, crack eggs into wells. Cover, cook 5-7 minutes until whites are set, yolks still runny.

Crumble feta on top. Fresh herbs. Dip focaccia in it. Aelford meets protein.

Protein: ~30g with feta
Serves: 2 (or 1 hungry raccoon)

BOUGIE EGG WHITE SCRAMBLE

5 egg whites
1 tbsp cream cheese
Smoked trout (or smoked salmon), flaked on top
Everything bagel seasoning
Fresh chives, snipped
Sourdough toast (because you're you)

Whisk egg whites with a pinch of salt. Scramble low and slow with the cream cheese — pull them off the heat while still slightly wet, they keep cooking. Top with smoked fish, everything bagel seasoning, chives.

Protein: ~25g
Time: 5 minutes

FRITTATA MUFFINS — Sunday Prep, Eat All Week

5 egg whites + 2 whole eggs
Smoked salmon, chopped
Fresh dill
Goat cheese, crumbled
Salt and pepper

Whisk eggs. Fold in salmon, dill, goat cheese. Pour into greased muffin tin (makes about 8-9). Bake 350F for 20 minutes until set and lightly golden.

Cool. Fridge in a container. Grab 2-3 every morning. Cold. Standing at the counter. Raccoon style.

Protein per muffin: ~7g
Three muffins = ~21g protein before you even get to the board.

ROBYNE'S FERAL BOUGIE PROTEIN PLAN 🦝💅

Daily target: 100-120g protein minimum

MORNING (20-30g):
Frittata muffins (grab 2-3, raccoon style) OR
Egg white scramble with smoked fish OR
Shakshuka with feta and focaccia OR
Protein smoothie (yogurt, powder, berries)

ALL DAY - BOARD LIFE (40-50g):
Smoked salmon, smoked trout, smoked mackerel
Good cheese (rotating, bougie, always)
Hummus and crackers
Prosciutto, salami, soppressata
Marcona almonds, pistachios, cashews
Hard boiled eggs
Marinated olives
Edamame with flaky salt

DINNER (30-40g):
Whatever delicious thing you cook — EAT THE PROTEIN FIRST.
Not last. Not "a small piece." A REAL piece.
You are not a side dish at your own dinner.

"I may be feral, but I'm bougie." — Robyne, July 2026

Aelford Sourdough Loaf

100g active starter (Aelford), 375g water, 500g bread flour, 10g salt.

Mix, autolyse 1hr. Four sets of stretch-and-folds, 30 min apart. Bulk 4-5hr til puffy. Shape, cold-proof overnight. Bake 500F Dutch oven: 20 min lid on, 20 min lid off. Cool fully before slicing.

(test card from Geoff -- delete me anytime)